May 20, 2000
shes heaven
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i got to see my friends I and A today. they moved to london a few years ago (A
is from there) and now they're having a baby. i miss I. shes a great person,
and one of my really good friends. we went to a local restaurant that i'd not
been to down the street. great food. i need to go back again and again.
had some pierogies, which are polish dumplings made with potatos and cheese.
sometimes its got meat, but these didnt. yum!
i have spiraled into a weird place lately. not a bad place, not a good place. the obsessive nature of my personality is in a governing place right now. which isnt necessarily a good thing either. i've been chatting online with this girl and shes down in austrailia. i know i've mentioned it before. anyway, my feelings for her are... lets just say more than platonic. i like her a lot. its hard to talk about here for many reasons. by the way Hi A... well i guess the gist is that i'm scared that things will end badly for me. not that i'm gettin any indications that it would. but like all relationships, you worry that you'll get hurt. i recall telling a friend of mine that i could tell this would hurt BAD if it ended. but enough of that. its also quite possible this is a really good thing. i like worrying though. its another trait i picked up from my mom. of course this could be the best match for me. i certainly have strong feelings of like for this girl... and i believe its somewhat mutual. since we dont have a quantifiable system to measure amounts of like, i dont know if i like her more than she likes me. but i do know we are both between 'like' and 'love' right now. i'll shut up now. this entry is way long. its also that way cuz i didnt entry last nite.
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